1/31/05

Dear Abby, I'm a crack dealer.

Dear Abby,

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth & one of my sisters, who lives in Pflugerville, is married to a transvestite. My father & mother have recently been arrested for growing & selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other 2 sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas. I have 2 brothers, one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his 3 children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time "working girl".

All things considered, my problem is this: I love my fiancé & look forward to bringing her into the family, & I certainly want to be totally open & honest with her. So, my question is this: Should I tell her about my cousin who supports the reelection of George Bush for President?

- taken from Matt's away message.